Oooh. I seem to have been shortlisted for Cosmopolitan’s Blog Awards. Will you vote for me? Please? Oh, go on. The other nominees don’t need you. They’re all teenagers with ten billion followers and a neverending supply of clothes worth photographing. I’m an ageing mother who’s still scared of Twitter.
Just click here, enter your email address and go to page six. It’s the “Lifestyle Blogger with Handpicked Media” category – and vote for Squeezed of Shoreditch. It takes two minutes, max.
Thank you. You’ll be making an old-lady blogger very happy.